Here comes Baby New Year, dragging a sack full of
self-improvement behind him. Lose
weight! Exercise! Learn a new language! Organize your life! Marie Osmond, the Rosetta Stone people, and Oprah
Winfrey will show us the way.
And so I give in to the urge to resolve. The notion of reinvention is too alluring,
like an untouched snow bank. It’s easy
to replace my Christmas “to do” list with a list for building a better Rita.
List, shmist. Enough
with the addition. I’m moving on to
subtraction.
I’m not giving up.
I’m letting go.
I still see each new year, each new day, as a repository of possibilities. As 2014 approaches I wonder what experiences
it will hold. But I don’t plan to greet midnight
with a long “to do” list designed to fix me once and for all.
Instead, I resolve to release a few things. I’m dropping dreams that suited an
18-year-old but don’t fit the person I’ve become---some visions are built to
last while others are as transient as leisure suits. I’ll also show those evil Wonder Twins, Guilt
and Regret, the door. That one will
definitely require divine assistance. I
don’t want to become impervious to the convicting power of Guilt, but I’m tired
of carrying it without cause. As for Regret,
he’s a nasty little fellow who promises to keep his distance only if I manage
to live an error-free life, and that’s not likely. Keeping him at bay will require daily doses
of grace.
My archenemy, Perfectionism, will not go gently into the
night. But I’m learning---slowly---that
the secret to winning that battle lies in the small victories. A mug in my kitchen is emblazoned with this
saying: “Strive for excellence, not
perfection.” I keep that little motto in
mind as I write. Only One is perfect and
He doesn’t expect me to be. He just asks
me to follow His lead and be the person He had in mind before I was born.
Would you like to travel with less baggage through
2014? Don’t give up. Just let go.
Happy New Year!